What did I say? What did I fucking say?

I'm sorry, but you fuckers had better listen to me in future, because all I ever do is get it right every single time.

I'm right, just about always, about everything. Politics, culture, the media and sport. Particularly football. I don't even know a great deal about football. But I'm just right about it. It's un-fucking canny.

For example, over the last half a dozen seasons, Arsenal have been the kings at being down by half time, only to recover and win a match by full time. They do this a disproportionate number of times. Most bookies offer at least 22-1 on Arsenal losing at 45 minutes to then win by 90. There are, what, 38 games in a season? So all you have to do is lay a bet on this eventuality on each match Arsenal play, using equal stakes, and you are guaranteed a profit by the season's end, even if they only pull this feat off twice.

They invariably do it a whole lot more than twice.

This little trick has netted me loads over the years. Watch out this season, though, they aren't playing like that anymore. Less goals and shit.

Oh yeah, back to me being right.

The other day, I wrote this piece here. It's about predictions, political and football, and a few observations about people who are good, bad and weird at predicting stuff.

In that piece, I said the following:

"...there's another bloke out there who likes making predictions. This bloke makes money out of it. He also happens to be the world's shittest person at making predictions, on account of the fact they are almost always wrong and based on fatuous logic and daft assumptions.

His name is Mark Lawrenson, AKA 'Lawro' and he works for the BBC making predictions on the outcome to Premiership football matches. He's scouse, which adds to the annoyance factor, and he used to play for Liverpool. This means that every week, he has Liverpool to beat whoever they happen to be playing two goals to nil. Which almost never happens. In fact, Liverpool winning almost never happens."

I ended the piece thus:

"Now off you pop to write up your weekend predictions. I predict that you predict Liverpool beating Wolves 2-0 at Anfield this Saturday. Go on, prove me wrong. Bet you don't."

This was before Lawro wrote and published his fresh round of Boxing Day footy predictions. Today, I checked the BBC football site and he's done them.

I ask you to check his prediction for the Liverpool - Wolves fixture.

Ay'thank'yaaaow.

P.s. Please also check his amazing logic behind the prediction. It's alongside 'Spurs don't win in the North West' and '[add manager's name here] is in trouble, so...'.

Yep, that's right. Liverpool 'desperately need to win this game...'

I love that. Because all of the other teams are super blasé about it all. Only Liverpool have realised the spectacularly crucial significance of a desperately urgent win, mid season. And, of course, they wouldn't have had this urge five games ago when they were still doing rubbish and up shit creek.

Sack this man now.