A Tale of Two Terrors

Hello

There's still some time left before the 5th of November ends and the 6th begins, so I thought I'd quickly knock up a timely piece noting an observation made earlier on today by Dame Demetriou (credit and 'hat tipping' where it is due and all that).

"Name me," she randomly asked after dinner, "two of the most memorable, seismic and explosive acts of political sedition and violence ever to take place in London."

So I thought about it, and was slightly annoyed with myself for only coming up with the obvious one. Then I thought a bit more, and discounted IRA stuff for not quite being big enough to be historical.

Then I gave up and Dame D offered her personal example: the 7/7 bombings.

"Fair enough," I said.

"Now tell me what Guy Fawkes and Mohammed Siddique Khan had in common," followed up Dame D.

So I thought about it a bit, and to my amazement, only differences between the two blokes came to mind. Then I thought a bit more...

"They were both pissed off."

"Naturally."

"They were both blokes."

"Yeah..."

"They both used explosives*."

* obviously Fawkes was foiled, but he intended to use them.

"Good, but not the answer I was thinking."

And then she hit me with it. Siddique Khan and Guy Fawkes, two terrorists who have left a huge blood stained mark on British history and who threatened to bring down the capital in a blood bath of terror and violence, were both from Yorkshire.

"Blow op the central line and I'll 'ave som pie 'n' peeeeas to celibraaate"

I can't stand these soft fockin' southern shandies

Guy Fawkes was from York, and Mohammed Siddique Khan was born in Leeds and eventually wound up in Dewsbury, West Yorkshire.

To re-cap in a slightly different way, two of arguably the most radical political acts ever to take place in the capital were plotted by Yorkshiremen. Not people born outside the UK, not Londoners, not Brummies, Geordies, Scousers, Mancs, Scots, Welsh, Irish, bumpkins from the South West or Fenlanders...Yorkshiremen.

This is interesting because, as I have found since living up here, people from Yorkshire tend to see themselves as living in, not so much a county, but a separate country to everyone else. They don't want to set up a passport system yet, but there is a bit of us vs. them going on. Not in a malicious way, but they just have their own strong regional identity which marks them out strongly against other people from the north and especially those from the south.

Yorkshire people also, to my mind, have immense patience and tolerance of others, though when that tolerance is pushed (or should I say, when Yorkshiremen and women perceive that their tolerance has been pushed and their freedoms breached) they act quite explosively.

Particularly their women, though I'd better not go there...

So I wonder whether there might be some vague, tenuous but potential correlation there. On the one hand, they seem like two utterly different blokes, and on the other, the similarities are startling.

Other similarities include:

• Their crimes are known by their dates, more than the content and details of the deed.
• Their main conspiracies were set to take place in central London.
• Their crimes were to be carried out by way of high explosives in order to blow people to smithereens.
• They were both from unfavourable religious minorities
  
• They both (though this is possibly disprovable) were obsessive and regular eaters of pie and peas. And they raced whippets...and didn't like spending money.

Something for you to chew on.

Now go watch some fireworks and quit jerking off.

Cheers.