Prem Betting Prediction

Apparently Man Utd are set to sign away their chances of winning the Premiership next season. They are on the verge of signing up Newcastle United's Michael Owen - possibly the worst, most overrated and useless player in the world.

Owen has been total wank for the last 9 years. He's always injured, he never scores (last time was in January), he needs more chances than a Las Vegas down and out and no matter how many forwards he is paired up with, he's about as useful as two tits on a boar. I can scarcely think of a worse player.

Sam Allardyce has given him the swerve, Hull would probably have considered him an expensive white elephant and personally, I don't think he's good enough for the likes of Leicester or Southend. He's a moody waste of space and a spoilt 'got rich too soon' cunt. The bloke annoys the fuck out of me quite frankly. He sums up what happens to the modern footballer when they use their early pay checks to buy Aston Martins and big houses - they lose the spark and the guts and make a farce out of their profession.

Liverpool are the perennial losers. They start off all shaky, pick up a bit but it's always too little too late. This is largely because they only have a couple of really good players and their manager is a dick wad who hasn't a fucking clue what he's doing.

Arsenal live in a fantasy land, still believing they are great whilst sending boys in diapers onto the pitch to do battle with men over the age of 24. Wenger is a lost it and his team are destined for ignominy for at least another decade.

For me, the best tip for the 2009/2010 season is Chelsea. William Hill are offering twos on the South London scumbags, which I think is well worth a punt. Their end to the last season was excellent and their players have settled in nicely. They will relish the challenge in a way that no other team possibly can.

Surely worth a few ton. Champers all round come May next year.

Adios, cunts.