The imminent Euro '09 election and further political musings

So I think that my recent foray into the underworld has taught us all some valuable lessons. I also believe that I have concluded, to the satisfaction of any sane, sentient being (reader of B&D or no) that the English Democrats Party and their pathetic, loutish, juvenile, ridiculous, semi-literate senior figure 'Steve Uncles' are not worthy of so much as a second glance.

I criticised key policy planks of that party's manifesto, specifically on political correctness, the EU and constitutional reform. With my main thrust coming from the fact that the policies of this 'party' are malformed, illogical and badly presented. Since then I have been called various names, ridiculously accused of hating all things English and of being anti-England. Nothing short of unsubstantiated, knee jerk drivel.

So that's the last I'll bother mentioning on the outfit - unless I find him picking a fight with me once more and then I may have to re-assess. Particularly if any of his supporters attack me (the last one, 'cassie', notably unchastened by Mr Uncles on the 'British Democracy Forum') with foul, mindless, racist overtones. I'm all for freedom of speech, but there are people out there that would view slightly stronger sentiments as those expressed by 'cassie' as crossing a legal threshold.

What the vast, vast majority of the electorate will continue to realise, regardless of the troubles amongst the main parties and the economy at large, is that right wing fringe-loon outfits always show their true colours in the end.

Those capable of rational thought will continue to eschew their mindless stupidity, pointlessness, aggression and bigotry.

I'd also point out here that according to my research, the English Democrats Party scored 0.8% of the vote in 2004. This figure, I am sure you will agree, is a derisory, hopeless and indicative outcome. I would be surprised if they took more than 1.2% this time around - and that would be optimistic (for them).

And so I return, where I was initially, to my thoughts on who to vote for in the upcoming European Elections. I believe that voting (even if it is a spoilt ballot) is extremely important. A moral duty almost. European elections are very important - for it is in Brussels that so much power is concentrated now. Enormous sums of tax payer's money is spent there - some 10% or so of GDP per year in fact.

I have decided to try a new approach in order to help me decide, as I keep changing my mind every five minutes.

I am trying to envisage how I feel as I walk out of the polling station having voted for any of those parties on the list. This is proving to be an interesting process.

When I imagine myself putting the 'x' against the box for Labour or the Lib Dems, I can envisage myself walking out of the station feeling unnerved. These parties are very pro Europe - their groupings in the European Parliament would strive to dissolve yet more sovereignty to Brussels and this can only be bad for this country in the long term. I would feel like I had acted almost immorally by voting this way.

The Tories - I feel like I have voted in a safe way. I don't feel unnerved or worried or bad. But, I can picture myself having vague misgivings. The Tories are mildly Euro sceptic and don't go far enough. Their talk about the Lisbon Treaty is somewhat of a distraction from the bigger picture. What we want is a referendum on our involvement in the EU full stop. The Tories don't offer that. They are also guilty as are the other three of milking the Great Junket that is European or even National politics (as we have seen in action lately with the expenses stories in the press).

BNP, EDP - I would feel like a man unable to look at himself in the mirror. The inner shame would truly be profound. I could never stoop so low, no matter how angry I get and reactionary I can sometimes feel in my darker moments. This is totally ruled out.

The Christian Party - I would feel like a man so hungover, that he was stupid enough to put his 'x' in the wrong box.

Socialists, 'No2EU' - I would feel like how any man would, having been accosted by a nameless brute where the tip of his red hot poker had just visited the deeper reaches of his anal cavity. Or, just plain fucking stupid.

'Jury Team' - I'd feel like a bit of a Maverick, but one who had voted for an outfit of which there is scant knowledge. I'd feel like a punter, but not necessarily a mug punter. I don't have issues with 'Jury Team'.

Greens - I'd feel a mixed bag of emotions. Having done more digging on the Greens, I understand them to be a very interesting party, that occupies a sort of left Libertarian spot on the spectrum. They have, in past years, put their hands out for left wing protest votes, going as a sort of 'socialist alternative'. These days, they are more sincere in their environmentalism. My main issue really is that they are a pro Europe party and for that reason, I'd feel awkward. I'd walk away feeling like I had somehow betrayed my core belief that a growing Federal Europe is the problem, not the solution.

UKIP - I would walk away wondering whether I had done a very stupid thing. Had I made a complete prick of myself for voting for an outfit that may have people in it that would hate me for being half Greek? Are they trustworthy? Are they the loony bins that Cameron makes them out to be? I'd be full of misgivings. But...I like their policies on paper more than any of the other parties standing.

Decisions, decisions, decisions.

I think it might well be out of these:

• Tories
• UKIP
• Jury Team
• [Spoilt ballot with rude message]
  

It is not an easy one, people. As the chap who does the voice over on The Apprentice might say, "the hunt for Sir John's political party to vote for, continues..."